June 10, 2003
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dickcarter is nearly one year old. hmmmm, lets think of all he has been.
well, he’s been critical and confused, horny and histrionic. and, he’s been mouthy. he’s waited and waited for tonight.
but, most of all, he’s been dick!
so heres to nearly 365 days of dick’s dimensions! cheers ya old toss pot!
Mature, respectable, Christian adult
¼ of a good time
hung like a mule
Gemini
Back arched, mouth open, mind blank!
Left to my own devices…I would
Reinvention is my pretension
Storm’s #1 fan
American music
Green lantern’s #1 fan
Temporary owner of golden earrings
Hicked Wot
Mutant
Ive never
Christ like
Lone star
Movie and book critic
Reader
Body guard
Storm tracker
Musculoso
Dancing queen
Kid
Asexual
Excelerator
Unemployed
¼ Cherokee
me-haul
plagerist
duke
smooth operator
masturbation expert
nude boy
hash connoisseur
varsity captain
#1 fan
blind guy
Columbian import
Hedwig
Romancer
Psychologist to the stars
Weekend lover
Peace maker
Patsy
Personal shopper
Designated blogger
Southern gentleman
Alliance builder
Friend to the manic and drunk
Survivor
Freudian dream analyst
Pure smartass
Drunk
Inseparable and ferocious companion
Wildcat
Hallowed saint
Mockery
Father time
Shirtless man
Meteorologist
Fellow slalom fanatic
Portrait of a changling
Smartass
Gentleman wordsmith
Blogger extraordinaire
Moby’s man
Bronze medalist in multiplication
Passive resistant
Sex therapist
Singing telegram
Commentator and former patriot
Hornblower
Alcoholic
Thar she blows!
Sonata high
Krafty kraut
Certified angus
County cheerleader
Asthmatic
Physically exhausted
Delightfully dewy
Dental damnation
Outside the box
Prototypical
Visually excited
Blatantly benign
Sobering up
Just to the left of spotlight
Some dude
Waste management
Nude stoner
Wad chucker; shirt sprayer
Painfully awaiting nose candy
Routed?
Intentional
Lucky to have windows
Highly irresponsible
For sale
Goin for gone?
Jose eber
Err, todd…todd tomorrow
Not really queer…yes, really queer…no, certainly not very ordinary
Truly, madly, deeply in margaritaville
Jane
Doped up
Glad to be of service
Finally
Perplexed
Programmed to receive
Laughing
Plath-esque
Riddled with issues
Swimming
Complacent
Lucky
Have a nice day
Rosemary, thyme & sage
Wantin’ a new drug
Self absorbed
Me rikey you
Garcon
Desperately seeking susan
Impressed
Approval seeker
Unrepenting
Swiss miss
Jingling through
Rastafarian
Womanizer
Mad gay
Earnest
Three pronged
Contrary
Sacrificial
Jolly friends forever more…
Nubian wannabe
Thoroughly pleased
Rotflmao
Rich
Wheel on fire
The other wheel on fire
Totally clueless
Springer
Oddly imperfect
Smoker
A couple of lubed spoons
White trash geek
Life is easy here?
Ancient Chinese secret
Slack jawed
Pleased to read
Supportive
No drag
Im just a boy
Good day
Totally sympathetic
Figurative
Keggers with kids
Neither here nor there
In your eyes
Team ks
Rusty side kick
Ill never tell
Helper
Solid platinum
Bloody stupid
Critique
Innocent woman & child
Abbreviator
Anchor
Running his mouth
Complete drunk
Wolf with the red roses
Delightfully disgusted
Permanent vacation
Defector
Carnivore
Jabber jaw
Smiling and whistling
Radical
Advice columnist
Hanging on
NID (Nine Inch Dick)
Near sighted
Ex patriate living in france
I don’t give a damn
Flaccid
Inexperienced
Potential draftee
Original
Dirrty
Shut-in no more
Green
Purveyor of perversion
In the know
Remorseless
Blissy
Poon lover
Amused
Happy to provide
Proud
Implicitly impressed
Nearly fucked
Lonely
Reesee cup & the fat man
Amazingly uncertain
Tropical
Obliged
Missing you
Interested
Ready
Mild to moderate
Victimized
Searching
Thanx
Hopeful as well
Because I can be
Hungry jack
Void in Alaska
QC
cq
goin to lee’s
catastrophic
banal bisexual
exclamation point
footloose man
sophistic sophomore
local
profoundly pitiful
big fun
mustached and mulleted
loud mouf
Caucasian
Enterprising
Two legged
Sick like you
aligned left
agreeable
cuban exile or scarred for life
operation Hawaiian tropic
intestinal
narcotic anal[gesic]
egoiste
altoholit
blue gum
glad
DSM XXX
carpet bagger
thankful for the props
ignorant
hippie
drunkard
marakesh bound
MD
at your service
observant of orders
witness to the event
the other half
at the dollhouse in fort Lauderdale
pur, pur dick
definitely Martha
hot from the beds
full belly too
smoke gets in my eyes
toilet tramp
not finished
?
the bitch daphne!
beautifully blatant
analingus
alienated
ciao
angel of doom
not tan enough
jealous
crave clubber
in cahoots
me
scullery maid
miss midwest midnight checkout queen
lower class
good will
signed, sealed and delivered
of Dick
openly honest
and Fuck You!
color and set
madder ‘n hell
pissed
saved by hell’s bell
kolor und set
hooked
str8
hippity, hoppity
oracally yours
i come and go
if looks could kill
home and dry
commenting on nothing
growing impatient
i want a positive role model
shake, rattle and roll out
thinking
unlike the rest
rusted
bender
still drunk
buck toothed
X
the only whore in chile verde
woman scorned
red stripe
tanorexic palellimic
hopeful
estranged no more
addict
psykhik
the reigning miss bar complex
non spanish speaking well wisher
barely coherent
too drunk to realize the insanity
one egg short…
council on child welfare
Friday kinda guy
Yes, I got drunk last night
Matrimonial muckraker
Fan
Smiling, fried egg face?
Your smiling face?
Fish eyed fool
Hesitant
Steady
Openly multisexual
Drunkcarrtter
Norton’s anthologist
Unlocked, half-loaded and not so ready!
Alive and kicking
Come over and see me sometime
Trader dick
These old bones
Off the road
Peace in
Peace out
Caddy lack
Home and dry
Personally
American heritage
The most fascinating person I know
Ceo, GinCon 2003
Unfortunate
Changling
Perennially unemployable
Sleepy bear
Bigbrotherneverleft
Too tired to sleep
Appreciative
Reckoner
Feelin fine
Optional
Feelin fine?
Editorially yours
Birthday boy
Some things are worth the risk
Got to be certain
Eulogistic
A fridge too far
Creep
Fast and furious
No more tears
Spouse
Damn near old
Malignant
Hating children about now
…id spend it all
eclipsed
one among millions
poet laureate of Crosby drive
shitty
if nothing else, predictable
xtatic xangaphile
see?
Grassy coveting
Crazy ass shit
Former skateboarder…err, sort of
Sincerely your loving fan; sharp knives?
In the open air
Nee Richard Alan Carter
An abstract voice
Hypocritical
Way doped up on shrooms
Soaking wet, drunken fun girl
Man without a hat
Superhero
Waiting
Tropical
Piss ant drag queen
Beautiful
Neither
Bushman
Confusing rant
Partner in porn
Supportive nurturer
Martha focker
Clueless
Ol’ smugs
Downed
Frontliner
Type 1
Eventfully optimistic
Grateful
Hungry
Uniformly non-conformist
Hambone in training
Reserved
LOL
French hen
Turtle dove
Partridge in a pear tree
Jingle
Bells
Sucker
Who?
Just browsing
Sponsor
Two way with cheese
Warm
Not retarded
Philosophizer
Gone
American
Dreaming of summer
102
matchmaker international
head lantern spark
dispute resolutionist
boy to man
concerned citizen
more jeer than cheer
friend-in-deed
best friend
obvious
brown
grouch
down on my knees
feline fanatic
poor
courteous, and receptive to courtesy
flame resistant
well wisher
touch and go
curious
a smidge too far
unemployed
cyber genie
swine
original sinner
common toilet goer
LBCeeinya
En route
Fire starter
Sober
Bored
Ghoul
Pornmeister
Uber model
Suburban housewife
Freak
867-5309
mistake
impatient
passive-aggressive
sentimental fool with tongue in cheek
brownie
like a prayer
angel
lucky star
stay-at-home drunk
chameleon
material boy
woman’s best friend
sage
smooth copier
wannabe
bill
waiting for tonight
ticky tacky
brief
pagan
smiley
cerveza’s twin, separated at birth
sexist pig
donkey’s ass
tool
believer
dirty dancer
war monger
avid reader
electronics & eprops specialist
midnight surfer
ditch rat
coke head
homey
mr. blue sky
starry decisis
nerd
mas fina
podiatrist
renaissance man
advocate
mute
wiccan wannabe
anonymously sober
senior citizen
airborne
Freudian
Horny
Tongue-in-cheek
Me
Esq
Groupie
Stalkerless
Cannibal
Pervert
Now and zen
Nubian god
Geisha
Friend of Barbie
Beautiful stranger
Of the clan Carter
Friend
Kentucky boy
Former fatty
Female impersonator
Thief
Arbiter
Exhibitionist
Author
Fundamentalist
Confused
Kentucky love
Mother nature
Closet opener
Optimist
Finger pointer
Not Irish
Definitely defined by routine
Messenger
Unable
Warped
Vicariously disappointed
Material girl
Optimistically saddened
Pseudo wise
Contestant
Long lost sibling
Cancer
Patient advocate
Lust for death
Falling down
Perennially ambiguous
Je n’ai sais pas pourquoi?
Male prostitute hopeful
First timer
Truant
Pretty in pink
Worth it
Prodigy
Bloke
Missing nut
Creep
Shitting all over self
Reactionary
June Carter Cash’s distant relative
Merry murderess
Hand walking queer
Break springer
Masonized
Languid in nature
Standard deviation
Vice lord
Questionable omnivore
Justin Guarini’s personal assistant
D’oh!
Roadie
L
guy in Kentucky
dead in a sense
waiting for tonight
bananafana
turning Japanese
eye candy
totally shaken
shew! he’s been through a lot! what will the next year hold? who will he be by then? will his epithet be his epi-tomb?
this guy in kentucky sure is unlucky…
dickcarter, Multifarious
Comments (21)
makes me wanna play abba and tell you i love you.
holy freaking poop! what dee phuck is dis list??!!! it was quite entertaining at that!
oh yeah, hung like a mule eh? i thought mules were sterile?
I like the idea of someone who is Christ-like getting stoned on shrooms.
happy 1 mr mule *finds himself wondering about dick’s dimensions*
So many comments, so very much time. Impressive list in so many impressive instants.
You started a trend that I have to admit I have been known to copy. From the big wigs at Xanga to the little people, how many people have signed their name followed by your patented italicized wit?
D-, knockoff of an original
P.S. It just wouldn’t be me if I didn’t point out that not only did you use “waiting for tonight” twice but “home and dry” as well.
Hell of a list! Sounds like a hell of a year
Here’s to the next one – may it be even half as entertaining as the last *toast*
A veryt large list indeed.
very* sorry ’bout that
I guess I missed long winded and half baked.
I’m gonna get you a t-shirt with all that on it.
I need a drink and some cocaine. Thursday.
MobyDick
that’s the longest entry ever~!
Impressed as always,
the bird
Here’s to ya, and if you’re drinking, have one for me. (Make it a shot of Jack, please!
)
I don’t need to mention this, but i’m going to anyway. I did not read all of what you are, but you are alot of things. i give you props for finding the time to write all that down…lol..I’d have sooner gotten a job then written all that down.
About the 100′s of dollars going into my tattoo(s) I know the prices which is why I went so high…I want a fuckin’ bad ass, sweet ass, totaly awesoem tattoo, and to get that I’ll have to dish out lotsa’ money. Yeah.
Shit. I forgot to end that with my name and a last line, sorta’ relating to the present situatiobn. Like how you do. Ok. here is how I ment to end that last comment
DRB – Dicks #1 fan
We (meaning “I”) wish to offer our great congratulations (meaning “leave a positive comment”) on the occurance of the one year mark (although I seem unable to find any entries older than last november. Odd.) and further to wish you many more years of unabashed strangeness.
With love, a fellow who still lives at “Jerry’s”….
GREAT! So many interesting little tidbits there, and you even mentioned the name of my favorite crummy bar!! (and youdidn’t even know it)
stalkerless? that is a long list!
I am exhausted– that was a hell of a ride there Kimo sabe… oh, waiter, gimme a banana daiquiri.
wow. that wuz a long list but still wow. if only. that wuz great. invigerating for the mind. stimulating for the eyes. w/e. but still mucho eprops!!!!
spookily enough, I notice that we are both going to be one on the same day. I tried to make a list of all the things that I’ve been over this last year, but all I could come up with was ‘absurd buffoon’.
oh. and I did write a nice poem for you once.
I like June.